Family topics are always difficult to talk about, especially when one had a hard time growing up because of the dysfunctional relationships with the parents. The mother wound is a term that explains the lack of connection with the mother, which happens more than we can imagine. It’s the complete opposite of what we know as a mother bond with her child, and it surely affects the person as they grow up.
Sometimes it even refers to the lack of a motherly figure in life. It happens when the mother is present and won’t create a bond, or in cases when the mother died or went away from the family before the child was aware of her existence.
The situation is manageable, but it requires a lot of patience and dedication until the person is able to heal from the emotional absence caused by the lack of a mother or motherly figure in their life.
But here is how to start:
1. Don’t ignore your emotions
You must acknowledge your emotions and pain, so you can start working on them. One of the most challenging steps to take is to recognize the feelings you have because of your relationship with your mother. Try not to suppress those emotions, because it can make the healing process so long. Additionally, you can ask for assistance from the happiness coach or the therapist, so you can both figure a way out of the emotional damage.
2. Self-care as a priority
You must take care of yourself in every possible aspect, including physically, emotionally, and spiritually. That means you’ll need to find a safe space to express your emotions, get enough sleep, eat well, and enjoy the activities that make you happy.
3. Set boundaries
This is a very difficult thing to do, especially when there was a history of emotional abuse or absence. Sometimes even parents try to make things right when children grow up, but that’s not always beneficial for anyone. So, setting boundaries with everyone who is triggering your mother’s wound is highly recommended, even though it sometimes means limiting or ending all contact.
4. Make your inner child happy
Before you heal, you need to help your inner child heal too. Working on it requires patience and dedication, but it surely helps you become a better person and never be like your parents.
5. Forgive your family and move on
You don’t need to tell them you’ve forgiven their sins. It’s more about you and how you manage the burden of anger and trauma. Forgiveness heals – don’t forget that. Once you forgive every one that hurt you in the past, you are ready to move on, even without those people in your life.
As we said, talking about these issues can be challenging and make you sad. But you don’t want to spend your life being traumatized by the events in your childhood. That’s why you need to ask for professional help if the family burden makes your life harder. It’s better to try healing instead of accepting the mother wound as part of your life and living with it forever.